A Nerds Guide to The Hobbit

First Thoughts: The importance of picking your fights : Videos

Brawl 100% Completion: Intense Boss Battles Brawl 100% Completion: Intense Boss Battles This marks my 100% completion of Brawl (took 2 weeks). This is what you see when you unlock and achieve everything, thread: smashboards.com At ... Rated: 4.7393618     Duration: 512 seconds     Video type: YouTube     Hosted by: www.youtube.com on Sun, 23 Mar 2008 11:47:19 PDT	Your First Shelter in Minecraft (Tutorial Machinima) Your First Shelter in Minecraft (Tutorial Machinima) www.youtube.com Click here to watch X's Playthrough of Half-Life 2 - Part 26! Your First Shelter in Minecraft (Tutorial Machinima) Minecraft ... Rated: 4.9242363     Duration: 600 seconds     Video type: YouTube     Hosted by: www.youtube.com on Tue, 24 Aug 2010 13:36:01 PDT	How To Shred Alternate Picking Basics Part 2 How To Shred Alternate Picking Basics Part 2 Get your FREE 2 hour shred guitar program and loads of other lessons at www.nielsvejlyt.com Hey there, I made this video because I got some ... Rated: 5     Duration: 258 seconds     Video type: YouTube     Hosted by: www.youtube.com on Tue, 17 Jul 2012 22:33:03 PDT	Preview: Fight Night round 4 scheduled/legacy mode realesd launches on June 25. Preview: Fight Night round 4 scheduled/legacy mode realesd launches on June 25. The new boxing game with some great and some wheee? things Is this wone of the greater optionele things to do I think this is the best boxing game ... Rated: 4.6363635     Duration: 116 seconds     Video type: YouTube     Hosted by: www.youtube.com on Wed, 17 Jun 2009 12:26:51 PDT
How to Pack for a Camping Trip : Pick the Right First-Aid Kit for Your Camping Pack How to Pack for a Camping Trip : Pick the Right First-Aid Kit for Your Camping Pack Insect bites, poison ivy, lesions, sun burns and scrapes are a few outdoor maladies that plague campers.Learn more in this free video series ... Rated: 4.5555553     Duration: 203 seconds     Video type: YouTube     Hosted by: www.youtube.com on Thu, 18 Oct 2007 11:42:50 PDT	The LA Complex - Choose Your Battles The LA Complex - Choose Your Battles Kal dives right into recording a new track for his new album. Connor finally uses his influence and gets Raquel a role. Nick and Abby's rocky ... Rated: -1     Duration: 2559 seconds     Video type: YouTube     Hosted by: www.youtube.com on Wed, 01 Aug 2012 15:55:37 PDT	Cane Defense - Picking the Rght Cane - Part 1 Cane Defense - Picking the Rght Cane - Part 1 Picking the right cane for your defense is just as, or MORE important that learning how to use it to defend yourself in the first place. In part 1 ... Rated: 5     Duration: 447 seconds     Video type: YouTube     Hosted by: www.youtube.com on Mon, 19 Jul 2010 06:35:06 PDT	Final Fantasy (NES) Video Walkthrough Part 1 - Preparing for adventure! Final Fantasy (NES) Video Walkthrough Part 1 - Preparing for adventure! I set the Respond Rate to 5, this is the speed at which battles progress. Adjust it to at least 4, or your fights will be very very slow. Press ... Rated: 4.8297873     Duration: 402 seconds     Video type: YouTube     Hosted by: www.youtube.com on Tue, 02 Jun 2009 08:26:47 PDT
First Lady Michelle Obama at Take Your Child to Work Day First Lady Michelle Obama at Take Your Child to Work Day First Lady Michelle Obama takes questions from the children of White House staffers as part of Take Your Child to Work Day. April 28, 2011. Rated: 4.4413409     Duration: 2160 seconds     Video type: YouTube     Hosted by: www.youtube.com on Thu, 28 Apr 2011 14:39:23 PDT	Day Old Baby Chicks, mail order... what to do when they arrive Day Old Baby Chicks, mail order... what to do when they arrive www.FredsFineFowl.com A short video demonstrating the importance of picking up your mail order chicks as soon as possible. They do suffer stress ... Rated: 4.5740743     Duration: 268 seconds     Video type: YouTube     Hosted by: www.youtube.com on Fri, 09 Jan 2009 09:22:05 PST	Fight the Bamboo Ceiling by Succeeding at Job Interviews: JT Tran at Wharton of UPenn (2/7) Fight the Bamboo Ceiling by Succeeding at Job Interviews: JT Tran at Wharton of UPenn (2/7) DOWNLOAD how you can kiss a girl in under 5 minutes with a live infield video demo at bit.ly at no extra cost to you. In part two of this seven ... Rated: 4.3333335     Duration: 887 seconds     Video type: YouTube     Hosted by: www.youtube.com on Wed, 27 Jun 2012 00:15:06 PDT	Lost Odyssey Walkthrough: Episode 154 - The Immortal One (Immortal Class) Lost Odyssey Walkthrough: Episode 154 - The Immortal One (Immortal Class) Beginners paper. You get that for winning the first battle, and subsequently get to fight in the rest of the light class battles. Second, in order ... Rated: 5     Duration: 1993 seconds     Video type: YouTube     Hosted by: www.youtube.com on Sat, 28 Jan 2012 03:12:51 PST
The Physics of Starship Battles: Lasers and Kinetic Energy The Physics of Starship Battles: Lasers and Kinetic Energy Here is an explanation of the perennial science fiction weapon. LASERS. Every show uses them but do any of them really know why? Here I explain ... Rated: 4.6759257     Duration: 599 seconds     Video type: YouTube     Hosted by: www.youtube.com on Tue, 12 Aug 2008 20:37:44 PDT	Shin Megami Tensei: Devil Survivor - Lucifer(first & second form) part one Shin Megami Tensei: Devil Survivor - Lucifer(first & second form) part one Lucifer first and second form Make sure you level up characters to 90+ since level have a huge impact towards the amount of you deal or take. For ... Rated: 4.8     Duration: 382 seconds     Video type: YouTube     Hosted by: www.youtube.com on Mon, 27 Jul 2009 09:27:59 PDT	Fight night round 4 Review Fight night round 4 Review Fight night round 4Wanne now the up and downs: When you first hop in the ring to trade blows with an opponent you'll notice that there are new ... Rated: 4.5     Duration: 255 seconds     Video type: YouTube     Hosted by: www.youtube.com on Wed, 24 Jun 2009 11:22:31 PDT	- Web Design - Live Website Redesign: Web Design Battle! - Web Design - Live Website Redesign: Web Design Battle! Hide your wife, hide your kids, we've got a Design Battle on our hands! Last week you saw Jose build on Aure's wireframes for the ... Rated: 4.6444445     Duration: 4164 seconds     Video type: YouTube     Hosted by: www.youtube.com on Wed, 28 Sep 2011 10:50:53 PDT
- Web Design - Live Website Redesign: Web Design Battle! - Web Design - Live Website Redesign: Web Design Battle! Hide your wife, hide your kids, we've got a Design Battle on our hands! Last week you saw Jose build on Aure's wireframes for the ... Rated: 4.6444445     Duration: 4164 seconds     Video type: YouTube     Hosted by: www.youtube.com on Wed, 28 Sep 2011 10:50:53 PDT	Banks Buying Bullion, Dollar Destruction and the Fight for Gold Banks Buying Bullion, Dollar Destruction and the Fight for Gold www.bloomberg.com l relaying an article I felt contained important information about the dollars declining value, big banks and big countries ... Rated: 5     Duration: 243 seconds     Video type: YouTube     Hosted by: www.youtube.com on Sun, 01 May 2011 15:35:49 PDT	God of War: Ghost of Sparta - Walkthrough Part 06 - Temple of Poseidon Pt. 2 (Spartan) God of War: Ghost of Sparta - Walkthrough Part 06 - Temple of Poseidon Pt. 2 (Spartan) thing on the other side of the area to obtain your first magic spell: Eye of Atlantis. You are granted infinite magic for the upcoming fight, so ... Rated: 4.7142859     Duration: 352 seconds     Video type: YouTube     Hosted by: www.youtube.com on Thu, 28 Oct 2010 16:00:40 PDT	Me, Myself, and TrollGath (Songs of the Summoned 2 - League of Legends) Me, Myself, and TrollGath (Songs of the Summoned 2 - League of Legends) base You and I were meant to fight Like two little trolls, playing on a grassy knoll Cold as ice, your mean advice, I hope your selfish pick was ... Rated: 4.818182     Duration: 180 seconds     Video type: YouTube     Hosted by: www.youtube.com on Sun, 07 Aug 2011 17:18:16 PDT
Dragons: Riders of Berk - How to Pick Your Dragon Dragons: Riders of Berk - How to Pick Your Dragon A rogue sea dragon is attacking Berk's fishing ships, but Stoick and his men have been unable to pursue the dragon by sailboat. Hiccup tries ... Rated: 5     Duration: 1354 seconds     Video type: YouTube     Hosted by: www.youtube.com on Wed, 26 Sep 2012 17:25:45 PDT	MonPets.mp4 MonPets.mp4 lose less. It strongly depends on who you're fighting against; therefore it'll be important to study your opponent before choosing to ... Rated: 3     Duration: 78 seconds     Video type: YouTube     Hosted by: www.youtube.com on Thu, 12 Apr 2012 08:57:22 PDT	~Please Watch!~ [Daisy Love Merrick] Your faith is all it takes ☼ ~Please Watch!~ [Daisy Love Merrick] Your faith is all it takes ☼ I was too shy to ask Britt (her dad) for permission to vid her so I hope he doesn't have anything against it ... Rated: 4.9272728     Duration: 70 seconds     Video type: YouTube     Hosted by: www.youtube.com on Sat, 21 Aug 2010 12:32:25 PDT	KHII - Sora vs Super Saix KHII - Sora vs Super Saix boring. That's why I use his official fight. For the fight, there's a pattern. First off, he's nuts. His attacks can depleted your HP ... Rated: 4.804348     Duration: 480 seconds     Video type: YouTube     Hosted by: www.youtube.com on Wed, 06 Feb 2008 17:32:12 PST

First Thoughts: The importance of picking your fights : Photo Gallery

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Monty Monty Monty	Looking Death In The Face - Scott and Stephanies Version is now posted in the comment section. Looking Death In The Face - Scott and Stephanies Version is now posted in the comment section. Looking Death In The Face - Scott and Stephanies Version is now posted in the comment section.	(4) Pulling Faces - How to start an end (4) Pulling Faces - How to start an end (4) Pulling Faces - How to start an end	FIRST THOUGHTS: THE IMPORTANCE OF PICKING YOUR FIGHTS - First Read FIRST THOUGHTS: THE IMPORTANCE OF PICKING YOUR FIGHTS - First Read The importance of picking your fights: To explain why U.N. Ambassador Susan Rice pulled out of consideration for the secretary of state post, it's important to remember this: A president only gets a finite number of fights with Congress, especially in ...
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Top 20 Hottest Goal-Scorers in World Football Today Top 20 Hottest Goal-Scorers in World Football Today That's around 46% of Barcelona's 50 goals in La Liga so far this season, which simply highlights the importance Messi has to his team. He can start off deep and run past five or six players and score, he'll score from 30 yards out with a free-kick ...	Sporeling Sprout, the humanoid wild pet you've always wanted Sporeling Sprout, the humanoid wild pet you've always wanted Slot 1 is where you'll get your move that deals actual humanoid damage, which is the entire point of picking up this pet to begin with. Jab does more ... There are many attacks in pet battles that do bonus damage based on whether you attack first or ...	Game Vs. Bengals: Head Coach Marvin Lewis Game Vs. Bengals: Head Coach Marvin Lewis On how important it was to come back and win in a short week after a loss last week: "Well, we realize what's at stake. So, I think we ... We hurt ourselves with the penalties and the things in the first and into the second quarter both offensively ...

First Thoughts: The importance of picking your fights : Latest News, Information, Answers and Websites

FIRST THOUGHTS: THE IMPORTANCE OF PICKING YOUR FIGHTS – First Read ...

First Thoughts: The importance of picking your fights – First Read. December 14, 2012 8:46 am Leave a Comment. Ambassador Susan Rice explains her decision to drop out of consideration for secretary of state, saying it was the 'right thing ...

Pacquiao suspended from fighting, must undergo brain scans

Manny Pacquiao will need to undergo a battery of brain exams following his devastating knockout loss to Juan Manuel Marquez, and is meanwhile suspended from fighting for 120 days.

Sporeling Sprout, the humanoid wild pet you've always wanted

Slot 1 is where you'll get your move that deals actual humanoid damage, which is the entire point of picking up this pet to begin with. Jab does more damage than Charge overall, but Charge guarantees that ... There are many attacks in pet battles that do bonus damage based on whether you attack first or second, so being aware of your speed in comparison to your enemy's speed is part of good play. If you expect to go first, but your opponent uses Charge, it can gut ...

why do people say they want to kill them self?

i wanted to kill my self and the thing that stoped me is this: i belive there is a God and if i kill my self i will burn in hell for ever...it is true. if u know this and still kill your self, it is not good news. i still wanted to die but i feel much better now. there are many out there that need help so why end and waste your life while u could be helping someone with their life? i think it is selffish to kill your self what do u think?
Answer: ......I do apologize for the lengthiness of this but I couldn't revise it to understand and hopefully to receive the full context and importance of it, sorry...... . I think we first have to understand that many people who feel they want to die, deep down do not, and we must take every single threat seriously. There are people who will try and fail at this, and then some who try and succeed, and I truly believe that every one of them feels they have no other alternative, but to take their life. It is used as an escape from great emotional and mental, even physical pain. Yes, in a way it is selfish but if we look at this for what it really is, people who are not thinking in the same manner that we as healthy minded people do. Being selfish is the last thing on a victims mind when they decide to take their life. This mental box (analogy) they are in seems to get smaller and smaller, until mentally every single thought in trying to find a way out has been used up, the last bit of light, now gone. They (not all) have concluded and believe in their minds that taking their life is best for everyone, so thinking in terms of how selfish they are is not something they have on their minds. Not all feel this way, there are some who do this out of revenge/anger, believing this is the best way to get even, to dump all their emotional guilt & pain on to someone else, usually a loved one. There are also accidental suicides, those that have overdosed and did not realize just how much medication they have ingested, then not thinking they pick up an alcoholic drink or two or more, which then causes seizures and death quickly. This has been and still is the case of far to many needless deaths, and a great many of them who have been or are in the wrestling federation profession or the WWF/WWE, as well to many movie actors .(This list is way to long which I just recently looked over)....One must also understand that mentally ill people who are having thoughts like this, cannot help their self, let alone help someone else when they have reached this point of believing they want to and will soon die. Those that have the courage to fight like heck to regain some form of composure and to find even the slightest reason to live, and many do, are the ones who are the greatest assets in helping others to find this flicker of hope they so desperately need to go on......Personally, I have lost far to many friends, and a brother to this dreadful evil called suicide, and where& when I can, I do my best to reach out to those in this emotional and mental pain. I also know what it feels like for myself to be in such pain and so overwhelmed with grief that we can lose all hope and sense of life/living, and wish for death to take us. My pain came soon after my son had died in a fire at 21 years of age, and although I wanted to die many times to be with him (irrational thinking), I found the courage through the grace of God to go on and wait for my maker to accept me when I died naturally on His terms. For many who are suicidal and not sure there is a God, also come to terms with death through these thoughts of suicide, asking their self this one important question, "Can I be 100% absolutely sure, there is no God"?...This is my take on the subject anyway, and for those who believe this is selfish should in my books think about instead, what they can do to reach out to those who so desperately need our help. Sometimes it just takes a caring person and a hug for someone to realize life can be a wonderful experience.
Category: Mental Health

Why should I live?

When I was teenager, I loved life. I had many dreams, and I thought I was going to have a great life. But my life was a complete disappointment. Nothing went the way I wanted. I seem to attract disaster. I didnt manage to fulfill any of my dreams. I dont have a family. I dont have any job. I live in a small town, and everybody knows about my life, which deepens my pain. Some people even mock me There is nothing worthwhile for me to live. I have had severe depressions sometimes, and I started to develop suicidal thoughts 15 months ago. Ive been very close to commit suicide twice, and the reason why I didnt go forward was because of my mother. I started to picture the next morning, when my mother would come in my room, and realize I was dead. So, I decided to postpone my death, until she dies. But honestly, I dont think I can handle it for so long. I know that the happiest day of my life will be the day I die. On that day, nothing will no longer have any importance It wont matter what dreams I had. Because my life had come to its end.
Answer: You should live because you have been given the chance to live and the chance to get your life right with God. You will have to know that while things did not turn out the way you exspected , then you have to carry on anyway. Those people in your town will not matter ten years from now or even two years from now. Who cares what they think anyway. Can you change the way they are? Can you change yourself? You can to some degree. Go fight for your life. Get on the right medications and maybe get on a good antidepressant. A good one is Cymbalta if you can take it anyway. Those people in your town have to pick on someone because that is what nosy no good for nothing people that have nothing else to do but to try to finish someone off that has it hard enough already. don't let those people bother you. Move on and change yourself. Get up when you go out in public and clean up very nice, look good and keep a good out look on things. You may be wrong about some of those people in your town and then you may be right about the other half. So what you do is.... Just always remember to treat others as you would want to be treated. Stay away from all people who drink and do drugs. These people are no good. They will make you look stupid because they want to divert the attention off of thier own stupid selfs. So natually they will try to make you the center of the talk. So what. Move on and get on with living, instead of dying! Put a smile on your face even when you don't feel like standing up in public. Keep your self clean and start totry to like these people a bit. I bet when you show these people that you are doing something for yourself then they will start to look at you in a whole new light. There may always be some bad apple in your life. Stay away from those type people. And do not allow thier oppinion of you to matter one bit! In the end it is Gods oppinion that matters most and then it is your Families oppinion that matters. Thats is who you will have left. You never tell anyone are you on disability or what? I take it that you are. Try to make the best of your life no matter what your circumstances are. I know it's easy to tell you this and I so mean well. I just want you to know that you can make it through the hard times. You will see a light at the end of the tunnel some day. God never leaves you when you are having it hard. He may allow you to gfo through some hard times and allow some poeple to make you feel like life is not worth living in your town, But sooner or later when you have had all you can take. God will step in and he will send better things your way. You sound like you are a young person. Everything gets better with age. It is the truth and even lifes hardships seem less bothersome for whatever reason this is. Maybe by the time you are older you can deal with things better or maybe you just don't care as much what everyone thinks of you. No matter the situation everyone has it hard. It's not just you that has it hard. Thier are so many people in this world who might have the same feelings as you and God knows this to because he knows everything. Talk to God and ask him what you are to do. Then sit back and the answer will come to you. In the meantime e-mail me and I will give you a place on-line that you can work and feel a little better about you! How is that. Ok well everything wqill be better. Always remember that god tells us in the Bible that it will not be easy to live on this earth. But God does tell us to fight the good fight. So don't drink alcohol, don't smoke for sure, don't hate someone just because they hate you, try to be good to your enemies and smile even when you feel like you wanna throw up, keep on keepin on, Make it a point to be a good person and be good to people. Don't assume that everyone is out to get you, stay away from the popele that seem to try to hurt you and staznd up for yourself in a positive way. don't argue with anyone, it gets you nowhere and does not help the situation even if you are in the right. State your case and walk away. Pretty much and if you have to start taking a few people to court. When bullies see that you are not going to take thier crap anymore then usually they start to back away from you, like cowering wild dogs! Remember that's who you have been dealing with, Cowering Wild Beast. They are beast of the Devil that come to Kill, steal and destroy. that is what satan comes to do and what do you think the people that are making you feel this way come to do as well. They are not good because if they had of been good then they would offer you a helping hand, instead when they see you down, they try to finish you off. Always be on the lookout for these kind of people. They are out there And they are vicious knowing that they have a short time left alone with satan. So place your invisable armor on you and keep on treading! As soon as you figure out you can make it then you will be ok. Now is all going to go well everyday? No way! Now are all people going to like you? Nope. Now are you going to feel good all the time. No Way! Now you may feel likme crap all the time but still you are alive and you have to live no matter if you like it or not@ So get up, clean up, fess up, and try as hard as you can to make your life worth living no matter where you are at! Good luck to you to. You will be ok! Being on disability is a blessing when you need it so do not feel so bad for if you really need it then you are ok my friend! Do not beat yourself up sp bad. This world will do that for you, so Always fight the good fight! And trat others the way you would want to be treated no matter how others treat you! You will start to see clearly what you sow you really do reap. God Bless you and you can do this!
Category: Mental Health

First Thoughts: The importance of Virginia - First Read

Jul 13, 2012 ... Recommended: First Thoughts: A fragile deal? .... VP pick, we have some oceanfront property in Nebraska to sell you. In fact ... TV ad this morning fighting back on the negative attacks it's receiving from the Obama campaign.

Next great enemy in WoW?

Who do you think will most likely be the next great boss in World of Warcraft? With Ragnaros, Cthun, Yogg-Saron, Illidan, Vashj, KaelThas, KilJaedan, Archimonde (whew), and now NerZhul himself, all defeated, who is the next threat to the world? (of warcraft :P) Personally, I find that players should be allowed to accept and complete quests for the Titan Pantheon themselves. Ridding Outland and maybe even big open areas in Azeroth of Burning Legion forces. I would hope for a ridiculously large chain quest in which the player discovers something small, like overhearing a conversation between Sargeras and one of his lieutenants, that snowballs into something of much greater importance. Sargeras is coming back to Azeroth. O.o Hes wielding Gorribal, the dark half of his old blade Gorshalach. Maybe during phase 3 of the fight against him, the leader of the Pantheon throws down Gorshalachs other half for the main tank to use. And maybe, just maybe, when Sargeras is almost completely defeated, he gets disarmed and leaves Gorribal for the main tank to pick up. So basically the main tank finishes off the Dark Titan by reforging the most powerful weapon in the universe and opening a can of extraterrestrial whoop-ass. And whats a large chain quest and damn-near-impossible boss fight without a ridiculous reward? Maybe...Gorshalachs dark half? xD Just leave your thoughts, comments, etc. here. (Also, when I said NerZhul is defeated, I meant WILL BE defeated.)
Category: Video & Online Games

Do you think that an anti-Muslim witch hunt is taking place in universities?

When I was at University over ten years ago the Islamic society was banned from our Union. http://www.icl-fi.org/english/wh/197/witchhunt.html Do you think that an anti-Muslim witch hunt is taking place in universities?
Answer: Yes there is an Anti-Muslim witch hunt. But it's not just in our universities. The reality is that they are becoming the face of the newly created "Devil"- http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AqywncRGeKO.yGDXaWlNHbrty6IX;_ylv=3?qid=20090814112928AAtrIke From Eric Hoffers, "The True Believer, Thoughts on the Nature of Mass Movements"- "Mass movements can spread without belief in a God, but never without belief in a devil. Usually the strength of a mass movement is proportionate to the vividness and tangibility of it’s devil. When Hitler was asked if he thought the Jew must be destroyed, he answered: “No….we should have then to invent him. It is essential to have a tangible enemy, not merely an abstract one.” (Quoted from Hermann Rauschning, Hitler Speaks) He later goes on to say- "It seems that, like the ideal deity, the ideal devil is one. We have it from Hitler-the foremost authority on devils-that the genius of a great leader consisted of concentrating all hatred onto a single foe, making 'even adversaries far removed from one another seem to belong to a single category.' (Adolf Hitler, Mien Kampf) When Hitler picked the Jew as his devil, he peopled practically the whole world outside Germany with the Jews or those who worked for them. 'Behind England stands Israel, and behind France, and behind the United States.' (Quoted from Hermann Rauschning, Hitler Speaks) Stalin, too, adheres to the monotheist principle when picking a devil. Formerly this devil was a fascist; now he is an American Plutocrat. Again, like the ideal deity, the ideal devil is omnipotent and omnipresent. When Hitler was asked whether he was not attributing too much importance to the Jews as an enemy, he exclaimed: 'No, no, no!...it is impossible to exaggerate the formidable quality of the Jew as an enemy.' (Ibid, p.235) Every difficulty and failure within the movement is the work of the devil, and every success is a triumph over his evil plotting." By "Far Removed" you cannot get much different than Radical Islam and Liberals. The Right has created a "devil" of their own, which is easy to do when many of the are religious in the first place and already have a belief in a Devil. So the Right assumes that the Communists, Muslims and Liberals are conspiring together to help bring down all those things they hold dear. By having a "devil" they have something to oppose and fight against. This makes them more fervent in their opposition to anything they disagree with-which they quickly toss into this category and focus their entirety on opposing- http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AiyOXI_hk0EkJunY3woWdFvty6IX;_ylv=3?qid=20100103015227AACCe5o&show=7#profile-info-68ee405bb00c52b1f70ed3481fd154f2aa
Category: Politics

6 Tips for Surviving Your First Content Marketing Conference ...

Not for all of us! Unless you're the networking natural, making connections at your first conference can be daunting. ... On that day, I never thought I would feel this way, but now I actually look forward to networking at conferences. So for ... Try fighting that feeling and speak to someone who you wouldn't normally. .... I think the most important point by far is point 4. Listen. ... My preference is to pick and choose the presetations that you feel are a good fit for your business.

Replay 2012 | Why Promoting Your Book Online is (a bit) Like Fight ...

Replay 2012 | Why Promoting Your Book Online is (a bit) Like Fight Club ... And the first rule of effectively promoting your book online is that you do not promote your book online. ... That's not the most important bit. .... refilling of the container with slightly less expensive “eco” refill bags, which no one was encouraged to do because it's so damn expensive that you're far better off hopping from brand to brand, picking up the half-price containers as they become available.

First Read

The first place for news and analysis from the NBC News Political Unit. ... Recommended: First Thoughts: The importance of picking your fights · Recommended: ...

Susan Rice Withdrawal: How Obama's Likely Secretary Of State Pick ...

Login with Facebook to see what your friends are reading; Enable Social Reading; i ... “Her decision demonstrates the strength of her character, and an admirable commitment to rise above the politics of the moment to put our national interests first,” the president said in a statement shortly thereafter. ... "As it became clear that this could be a partisan food fight she decided it wouldn't be true to who she is to be a distraction to the priorities of the president's agenda." ...

First thoughts from the first presidential debate

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What does it Mean to "Pick Your Battles"?

To pick your battles is to select a specific issue of importance to focus on rather ... the parent could pick one serious issue to focus on first, such as a tendency to ...

name and describe 4 main causes of the build up to World War 1.?

looking back in time, how could have this build up been changed to bring about peace? write down your thoughts in detail.
Answer: 1. The Balkans. A region prone to conflict, as is still the case, and with a significant power (Russia) wishing to protect the interests of fellow Slavs, the potential for the area to engulf other countries in conflict was clear. 2. Germany's envy of Britain's empire. Following German unification in 1871, it found itself behind in the race for acquiring overseas territories. At the Berlin Conference of 1884-85, Germany's rights over certain African colonies were recognised. Germany needed overseas territory for its booming population. It was haemorraghing people, with Germans leaving in their droves for the USA. Far better, for Germany's purposes, to have German nationals populating its overseas colonies instead. However, very few of its overseas territories had climates amenable to north Europeans - the best was South-West Afrika (now Namibia), where the Germans undertook a campaign of genocide against the Herero and Nama people, to clear land for settlement, but this resulted in international condemnation. Germany built up a huge navy, to rival Britain, in the understanding that an enlarged overseas empire needed proper logistics to maintain it. 3. Oil. the British navy had converted from steam-power to oil, and Germany's new navy was oil-powered from the start. Both powers recognised the importance of the Middle East for securing access to oil supplies. Britain's method was to pick a fight with the crumbling Ottoman Empire, as a result of reneging on a paid-for contract to supply the Turks with warships. We hear a lot about Gallipoli, but one of the first acts of the Great War was the British occupation of the area now known as Iraq. Germany's policy, however, was to be a friend and ally of Turkey, and sought to build the Berlin to Baghdad railway to ensure its oil supplies. After the war, Britain and France took over Turkey's former Arab territories. 4. The effect of changes in the overall might of empires. At that time most of the world was part of one empire or another. The only significant region that was independent was Latin America, which had freed itself from colonial rule within the previous 100 years. There were five types of empire (according to my analysis), though not all took part in the war ... a) Embryo (i) Japan - it had already shown its strength in a war with Russia in 1904-05, and was later to start an aggressive campaign of territorial acquisition in the 1930s. b) Growing (i) USA - it had already defeated an ageing power (Spain) in 1898, and had acquired Puerto Rico, the Philippines and Guam. It also declared its interest over Latin America, with the Munroe Doctrine. It had a growing economy which needed overseas markets. (ii) Germany - Prussia had defeated Denmark (1864), Austria-Hungary (1866) and France (1870-71), and established its military power in central Europe. It had acquired territory like Togoland (Togo), South-West Afrika (Namibia), East Afrika (Tanzania), Cameroon, Burundi, Rwanda in Africa. Further afield it had New Guinea and some Pacific islands, but wanted much more. c) Peak (i) Britain - the sun didn't set on the British Empire. It was at its height, but was still prepared to acquire more territory, with its eyes on the Middle East. It had previously taken territory from Argentina (Falklands) and Venezuela (Guayana Essequiba), but had been warned off further ventures there by the USA. (ii) France - also at its height with extensive territory across north and west Africa. It had previously lost territory in the Americas and the Indian sub-continent to Britain. After its abortive venture in Mexico, it too had been warned off by the Americans. d) Crumbling (i) Russia - it had a huge empire across Asia, but with various ethnic and Islamic groups pushing for independence. In the Russian heartland, leftist parties like the Bolsheviks, Mensheviks, Social Revolutionaries and anarchists were pushing for political change. (ii) Austria-Hungary - there were several ethnic groups in the Balkans pushing for freedom, many influenced by the newly independent Serbia. Italy was also resentful of Hapsburg control of what is now north-east Italy. (iii) China - another huge empire in Asia, but with political tension as unrest developed against Sun Yat-sen's Kuomintang party, and warlords had free reign in northern China. e) Terminal (i) Turkey - it had lost nearly all its territory in Europe, and most of its remaining possessions were in the Arab lands. It lost all of its remaining empire as a result of the war. (ii) Portugal - it had lost its jewel (Brazil), but still had territory elsewhere (including Angola, Mozambique, Guinea-Bissau, Cape Verde, Goa and Macao). It held on to them through staying out of the two world wars. (iii) Spain - it too had lost most of its empire, but clung on to places like Western Sahara and Fernando Po / Rio Muni (now Equatorial Guinea) by keeping out of the world wars. All this resulted in pressure points around the world and potential territories to be fought over.
Category: Other - Society & Culture

First Thoughts: Presidential race couldn't be tighter - how each one ...

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2012 Democratic National Convention — September 3rd-6th ...

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crossing the line - from platonic to romantic relationship?

So this is a short story of my friend and I: a bit long but tried to make it easy to read Weve been friends for about 6 years now. We met in 9th grade, later we both changed to the same school, picking the same classes to be classmates, and now we go to the same college spending time together and car-pooling. Now considering to move together as roommates. We hang out often, and we call each other regularly - sometimes talking for hours. We have shared many good times, some not so good but always we have been there for each other. We havent had a fight during all these years and when theres a disagreement it ends with both joking and laughing about it. It has been so nice that Ive always wished Ive had a girlfriend with whom I had a relationship at least half as good as my relationship with her. Im sure I love her but I always thought of it as platonic love. What has changed now? So I have had several or relatively many relationships with different types of girls but my last relationship was a bit rough, full of conflicts and drama. We had disagreements like any other couple but the way we handled them often led to big fights so I decided to end it for the good of both and I decided to stay single for sometime, dedicating more time to my academic goals. So during this time Ive been single, a couple of months ago I had an erotic dream with my friend and even though I reduce the importance of dreams, believing them to be a result of neuronal interaction, completely irrelevant and unrelated to the future, I couldnt help but to keep the image of both sharing intimacy, a couple of times even day-dreaming about it. I left that thought alone purposely and tried to forget about it. I did it successfully and I could say Im not obsessed with the idea of us having sex but now, Ive been feeling "funny" feelings toward her, romantic in nature but difficult to explain with words. The way I see her physically has changed also. Before to describe her I could have used words like good looking and in-shape, now I could use adjectives like "cute," "lovable" or "beautiful" So what to do? Its not my goal by any means to have sex with her, especially considering she has decided to remain virgin to this point of her life, admirably not because of "virginity til marriage" ideals that comes from collective thoughts developed through years and based on the standards of our society - normally inculcated through parenting, but because she simply has judged interested parties as not appropriate for her out of her own convictions. She hasnt even had a boyfriend, very few making it for a first date but failed to be what she looks for in a person. She’s one of a kind. Just asking her for sex would make me feel like the wolf and the lamb and not what I want at all. Probably under a different setting in which we have been a boyfriend and girlfriend for sometime, having a chance for a long term relationship and making sure its not something she could regret she did So my dilemmas come to be reduced to: Platonic vs Romantic relationship. One hand I think we have potential for a life time friendship, and a great one. I’m sure I could have other friendships in the future but I doubt I could find one like this, and think it’s unlikely I could love, appreciate and respect someone like I do with her. Crossing the line could represent and end to what we have. On the other hand, there’s the concern of looking back and wonder what could have been if I had crossed the line? Could we have made it for a long life relationship, including marriage, procreation, and growing old? Wait and see vs. Do something about it I guess I could wait to clear doubts, whether it is momentary situation because I’ve been single for about a year now or if it’s a genuine and long lasting feeling before I talk to her about it. On the other hand, what if I wait til it’s too late and she finds someone she reaches a zone of comfort with and it is too late for me when I could have been a good boyfriend? This situation is confusing and Im not even sure what Im hoping to find here. Perhaps typing it down and reading helps. It would be nice to see some opinions and would appreciate healthy advice thanks if you read to this point.
Answer: So. Many. Words. Anyway, I mostly just skimmed, but I think you should tell her how you feel when you get some alone time. It'd be really sweet. Good luck. :) answer mine, please? http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20111217233759AARVICP
Category: Singles & Dating

What is defence mechanisms?

and what has it got to do with ego, id and superego?
Answer: Hi Dean, Id, ego, and superego are aspects of the "self" in Sigmund Freud's approach to psychology. Defense mechanisms are used to protect and maintain a stable, positive sense of who we are and to avoid different types of anxiety that's produced when the aspects of self are in conflict or when there are real threats with which we must cope. Some examples of defense mechanisms include: Acting Out When an inner conflict (most often, frustration) translates into aggression. It involves acting with little or no insight or reflection and in order to attract attention and disrupt other people's cosy lives. Denial Perhaps the most primitive and best known defense mechanism. People simply ignore unpleasant facts, they filter out data and content that contravene their self-image, prejudices, and preconceived notions of others and of the world. Devaluation Attributing negative or inferior traits or qualifiers to self or others. This is done in order to punish the person devalued and to mitigate his or her impact on and importance to the devaluer. When the self is devalued, it is a self-defeating and self-destructive act. Displacement When we cannot confront the real sources of our frustration, pain, and envy, we tend to pick a fight with someone weaker or irrelevant and, thus, less menacing. Children often do it because they perceive conflicts with parents and caregivers as life-threatening. Instead, they go out and torment the cat or bully someone at school or lash out at their siblings. Dissociation Our mental existence is continuous. We maintain a seamless flow of memories, consciousness, perception, and representation of both inner and external worlds. When we face horrors and unbearable truths, we sometimes "disengage". We lose track of space, time, and the continuum of our identity. We become "someone else" with minimal awareness of our surroundings, of incoming information, and of circumstances. In extreme cases, some people develop a permanently rent personality and this is known as "Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID)". Fantasy Everyone fantasizes now and then. It helps to fend off the dreariness and drabness of everyday life and to plan for an uncertain future. But when fantasy becomes a central feature of grappling with conflict, it is pathological. Seeking gratification - the satisfaction of drives or desires - mainly by fantasizing is an unhealthy defense. Narcissists, for instance, often indulge in grandiose fantasies which are incommensurate with their accomplishments and abilities. Such fantasy life retards personal growth and development because it substitutes for true coping. Idealization Another defense mechanism in the arsenal of the narcissist (and, to lesser degree, the Borderline and Histrionic) is the attribution of positive, glowing, and superior traits to self and (more commonly) to others. Again, what differentiates the healthy from the pathological is the reality test. Imputing positive characteristics to self or others is good, but only if the attributed qualities are real and grounded in a firm grasp of what's true and what's not. Isolation of Affect Cognition (thoughts, concepts, ideas) is never divorced from emotion. Conflict can be avoided by separating the cognitive content (for instance, a disturbing or depressing idea) from its emotional correlate. The subject is fully aware of the facts or of the intellectual dimensions of a problematic situation but feels numb. Casting away threatening and discomfiting feelings is a potent way of coping with conflict in the short-term. It is only when it become habitual that it rendered self-defeating. Omnipotence When one has a pervading sense and image of oneself as incredibly powerful, superior, irresistible, intelligent, or influential. This is not an adopted affectation but an ingrained, ineradicable inner conviction which borders on magical thinking. It is intended to fend off expected hurt in having to acknowledge one's shortcomings, inadequacies, or limitations. Reaction-Formation Acting opposite of the way you feel. Whistling past the cemetery for example. Regards.
Category: Sociology

The importance of your first kiss?

Im a second year university student and am nineteen years old, but I have never been kissed. Though it may seem old fashioned to some, I have always had a firm belief that a first kiss with anyone should be truly special with the right man. A wonderful kiss to remember for the rest of your life, but now after a year at university I must admit my foundations are shaken. I have been asked to be someones girlfriends a few times but I have always refused as I didnt like them back in that way, they never made me feel particularly excited when I met up with them. Boys have also asked me to kiss them on the dancefloor but Ive always declined them as I didnt know their name. I just dont understand how some people behave, Ive met boys on a night out who think its acceptable to dance or grind near me, and expect a kiss or something more even though I dont have a clue what their name is. Some peoples behaviour is truly horrifying and all I can do is duck or decline. A guy has even picked me up and said “Let’s find the closest hotel!” I had always believed that you get to know someone, and when you both like each other and the moment is right then you kiss them. But when I see peoples flippancy about their kiss I get really confused. I had always thought a kiss was an important thing, not something that can handed out to everyone who asks. This year also opened my eyes to how couples behave. I have met people who are in a relationship who cheat on their partners over long periods and who continuously flirt with other people. I had always believed that when you were in a relationship, you would treat each other specially. If I had a boyfriend I would never flirt with someone else, I think its just morally wrong. I would hate to think that my boyfriend would flirt with others when he is in a relationship with me. The thought horrifies me, I would just love to be able to meet a nice person who would treat me well but after last year I just cant see it. Im starting to lose faith, Ive began to have thoughts like... "Youre being silly. Just kiss someone so you can know what it’s like and you can move on from this.” I just don’t know anymore, all the men I’ve met just want to make out on the night and I refuse. I just can’t tell if I’m fighting a losing battle, I certainly have nothing to gain from being like this but I always had the thought that it would pay off, and I’ll have a first kiss to remember for the rest of my life. I would just like to know what people think, whether it really would be worth it in the end.
Answer: I agree with you, I think a kiss can mean a lot when with the right person and too many people hold things like that of little value. I didn't have my first kiss until I was 22! When I told the guy I expected him to laugh but he just said that made it special. As for whether you just get it over with or not, that all depends on you. In a way I think I was putting too much importance on it, and that it's not my first kiss that's the most important, it will be my last first kiss which will be. But at the same time I'm so glad I didn't kiss some of the guys who wanted to kiss me! There was always something holding me back though, and I realise now that when the time and person is right you do just know. As for relationships in general, flirting and cheating is common although I would never do it myself. I can't understand the lack of commitment and loyalty today, but I'm hoping by being a good person who takes relationships seriously I'll attract a like minded guy. It's all we can do :)
Category: Singles & Dating

good quotes on anti bullying and quotes to make a change and helping others?

i need some good quotes about people trying to change peoples thoughts on bullying and things in the same category Example-gays.
Answer: “If you let a bully intimidate you, he's going to do it again. You've got to stand up to these strong-arm tactics.” - Charles Djou “If you can't, continue to be nice to them. Eventually, they may start being nice. A bully wants to have friends, too.” - Cara Van Ness “michael snow is gay :l. \ »2149-46” - Billybob mcranklin “The more kids are aware of what bullying is, the better. Simple teasing can really take a toll on a kid. We just want kids to know [bullying] when they see it, so they can at least try and stop it.” - Carl Sousa “We were about the youngest ones and the older ones would pick on us. When they would bully us, we'd double-team them.” - Corperryale Harris “We can manage without illegal means. We can do that. It's much easier to be the bully guy in the neighborhood. But we can manage without these means.” - Zvi Rish “If kids have an early start, they have the skills necessary to fight off a bully or someone trying to sell them drugs. Kids are resilient. If someone tries to get them into drugs, they have the skills to say no because someone talked to them about the importance of standing up for themselves at an early age.” - Darcy Dixon
Category: Quotations

Picking your Battles - eHarmony Advice

Home > Relationship Problems > Picking your Battles ... spouses reported that their marital satisfaction was unaffected by being thought of as annoying.

Rise and Shine « The Obama Diary

More of Barbara Walters' exclusive first joint, post-election interview with President Obama and first lady Michelle Obama airs tonight on “20/20″ at 10 p.m. ET on ABC stations. .... I don't always agree with him, but I thought this was pretty spot on. .... The importance of picking your fights: To explain why U.N. Ambassador Susan Rice pulled out of consideration for the secretary of state post, it's important to remember this: A president only gets a finite number of fights ...

Thoughts On Pitbulls?

Im getting a Pure Bread Pitbull from a friend of mine next week. Its white with 2 black spots on it. Any good names? Any thoughts on the breed? Anyone own one? Any tricks to training? Any information that I can get will be greatly appreciated. Thanks! Its a Male.. the owner right now call him Moo cause he looks like a cow.. and I know that there arent a real bread of pitbull... i was just meaning that 2 pitbulls were the parents Its an american pitbull... its 2 weeks old and im waiting for it.. ive been researching online and this isnt my first attempt at learning about the breed.. its always nice to ask on this site and get responses from people that have first hand experience...
Answer: I have a pit bull mix (Staffy and Am Bulldog). Welcome to the joy of owning a "bully breed"! My advice to you as a pit bull owner is to do as much research as you can about them, so that you are adequately prepared to be a responsible owner. Owning a pit bull is NOT the same as owning a Golden Retriever, so I advise you not to go into it with that attitude. As a pit bull owner, you will come under much more scrutiny than the average dog owner, so be prepared, Be prepared to have people make derogatory remarks about you and your dog. Be prepared to have people cross the street to avoid you and your dog. Be prepared to be denied rentals and boarding options. But most of all, be prepared for your hard work and dedication to defending your dog to pay off tenfold. Pit bulls don't do anything unless they do it 110% percent. They work hard, play hard, and love harder. They demand a TON of time and attention. They're what you would call "people" dogs, not "dog" dogs. Which reminds me to advise you to familiarize yourself with the term "dog aggression". Responsible pit bull owners are aware of this trait, respect it, and take proactive measures to ensure the safety of their own dog and the pets of others. I could go on and on, but instead I'll direct you to my favorite websites that have a ton more information for you. I can't stress enough the importance of knowing your stuff when it comes to pit bull ownership. The main reason so many pit bulls (and mixes) and up in shelters is lack of owner knowlege about the breeds. So read up on the breeds, talk to people that own them, get the facts and don't believe the hype that surrounds them. I am praying you are getting a pit bull because you want a companion dog, not a status symbol. Best of luck! Here are some good sites: www.happypitbull.com (my favorite) www.stopbsl.com www.understand-a-bull.com www.therealpitbull.com www.blessthebullys.com www.pitbullsontheweb.com Also, you can pick up copies of "Bully Breeds" magazines at any local pet supermarket (like Petco, etc.). They're part of the "Popular Dog" series. Pick up "Training Secrets of BUlly Breeds" too! Edit: Owlwoman is full of shit. Her dog was less filled with "killer instict" as it was with "terrier instinct." Most, but not all, pit bulls demonstrate some degree of "dog aggression". This same idea also applies to small animals (like kittens) as well as other dogs, thus making such killing behavior quite predictable and reinforcing the importance of being a knowledgeable and responsible owner (as Owlwoman clearly was not). Had she been, she would have known that small animal aggression is not "unpredicatable" behavior, but quite common for such breeds as terriers, and perhaps would have taken more measures to supervior her pit bull around kittens. DUH! Also, pit bulls are not "tortured" into fighting. If you read about the pit bulls' history as working dogs first (bullbaiters), it makes sense that fighting is actually an extremely self-rewarding activity for them (i.e., they're good at it, so they like it!). Not that that makes it OK to fight them, but I just wanted to make that correction.
Category: Dogs

GOP Image Suffers as Fiscal Cliff Fight Grinds - NBC Miami

Rice, widely seen as Obama's top pick to succeed outgoing Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, ... to rise above the politics of the moment to put our national interests first. ... "Chavez is very important for Latin America, but if he can't continue at the head of ..... NBCNews.com on your phone · NBCNews.com on your Facebook ...

What are defense mechanisms?

Spent the last month reading about personality disorders. Every text including Vaknins "Malignant Self-love" talks about "defense mechanisms" but no one explains what they are! HELP!
Answer: According to Freud and his followers, our psyche is a battlefield between instinctual urges and drives (the id), the constraints imposed by reality on the gratification of these impulses (the ego), and the norms of society (the superego). This constant infighting generates what Freud called "neurotic anxiety" (fear of losing control) and "moral anxiety" (guilt and shame). But these are not the only types of anxiety. "Reality anxiety" is the fear of genuine threats and it combines with the other two to yield a morbid and surrealistic inner landscape. These multiple, recurrent, "mini-panics" are potentially intolerable, overwhelming, and destructive. Hence the need to defend against them. There are dozens of defense mechanisms. Acting Out When an inner conflict (most often, frustration) translates into aggression. It involves acting with little or no insight or reflection and in order to attract attention and disrupt other people's cosy lives. Denial Perhaps the most primitive and best known defense mechanism. People simply ignore unpleasant facts, they filter out data and content that contravene their self-image, prejudices, and preconceived notions of others and of the world. Devaluation Attributing negative or inferior traits or qualifiers to self or others. This is done in order to punish the person devalued and to mitigate his or her impact on and importance to the devaluer. When the self is devalued, it is a self-defeating and self-destructive act. Displacement When we cannot confront the real sources of our frustration, pain, and envy, we tend to pick a fight with someone weaker or irrelevant and, thus, less menacing. Children often do it because they perceive conflicts with parents and caregivers as life-threatening. Instead, they go out and torment the cat or bully someone at school or lash out at their siblings. Dissociation Our mental existence is continuous. We maintain a seamless flow of memories, consciousness, perception, and representation of both inner and external worlds. When we face horrors and unbearable truths, we sometimes "disengage". We lose track of space, time, and the continuum of our identity. We become "someone else" with minimal awareness of our surroundings, of incoming information, and of circumstances. In extreme cases, some people develop a permanently rent personality and this is known as "Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID)". Fantasy Everyone fantasizes now and then. It helps to fend off the dreariness and drabness of everyday life and to plan for an uncertain future. But when fantasy becomes a central feature of grappling with conflict, it is pathological. Seeking gratification - the satisfaction of drives or desires - mainly by fantasizing is an unhealthy defense. Narcissists, for instance, often indulge in grandiose fantasies which are incommensurate with their accomplishments and abilities. Such fantasy life retards personal growth and development because it substitutes for true coping. Idealization Another defense mechanism in the arsenal of the narcissist (and, to lesser degree, the Borderline and Histrionic) is the attribution of positive, glowing, and superior traits to self and (more commonly) to others. Again, what differentiates the healthy from the pathological is the reality test. Imputing positive characteristics to self or others is good, but only if the attributed qualities are real and grounded in a firm grasp of what's true and what's not. Isolation of Affect Cognition (thoughts, concepts, ideas) is never divorced from emotion. Conflict can be avoided by separating the cognitive content (for instance, a disturbing or depressing idea) from its emotional correlate. The subject is fully aware of the facts or of the intellectual dimensions of a problematic situation but feels numb. Casting away threatening and discomfiting feelings is a potent way of coping with conflict in the short-term. It is only when it become habitual that it rendered self-defeating. Omnipotence When one has a pervading sense and image of oneself as incredibly powerful, superior, irresistible, intelligent, or influential. This is not an adopted affectation but an ingrained, ineradicable inner conviction which borders on magical thinking. It is intended to fend off expected hurt in having to acknowledge one's shortcomings, inadequacies, or limitations. Projection We all have an image of how we "should be". Freud called it the "Ego Ideal". But sometimes we experience emotions and drives or have personal qualities which don't sit well with this idealized construct. Projection is when we attribute to others these unacceptable, discomfiting, and ill-fitting feelings and traits that we possess. This way we disown these discordant features and secure the right to criticize and chastise others for having or displaying them. When entire collectives (nations, groups, organizations, firms) project, Freud calls it the Narcissism of Small Differences. Projective Identification Projection is unconscious. People are rarely aware that they are projecting onto others their own ego-dystonic and unpleasant characteristics and feelings. But, sometimes, the projected content is retained in the subject's awareness. This creates a conflict. On the one hand, the patient cannot admit that the emotions, traits, reactions, and behaviors that he so condemns in others are really his. On the other hand, he can't help but being self-aware. He fails to erase from his consciousness the painful realization that he is merely projecting. So, instead of denying it, the subject explains unpleasant emotions and unacceptable conduct as reactions to the recipient's behavior. "She made me do it!" is the battle cry of projective identification. We all have expectations regarding the world and its denizens. Some people expect to be loved and appreciated - others to be feared and abused. The latter behave obnoxiously and thus force their nearest and dearest to hate, fear, and "abuse" them. Thus vindicated, their expectations fulfilled, they calm down. The world is rendered once more familiar by making other people behave the way they expect them to. "I knew you would cheat on me! It was clear I couldn't trust you!". Rationalization or Intellectualization To cast one's behavior after the fact in a favorable light. To justify and explain one's conduct or, more often, misconduct by resorting to ":rational, logical, socially-acceptable" explications and excuses. Rationalization is also used to re-establish ego-syntony (inner peace and self-acceptance). Though not strictly a defense mechanism, cognitive dissonance may be considered a variant of rationalization. It involves the devaluation of things and people very much desired but frustratingly out of one's reach and control. In a famous fable, a fox, unable to snag the luscious grapes he covets, says: "these grapes are probably sour anyhow!". This is an example of cognitive dissonance in action. Reaction Formation Adopting a position and mode of conduct that defy personally unacceptable thoughts or impulses by expressing diametrically opposed sentiments and convictions. Example: a latent (closet) homosexual finds his sexual preference deplorable and acutely shameful (ego-dystonic). He resorts to homophobia. He public berates, taunts, and baits homosexuals. Additionally, he may flaunt his heterosexuality by emphasizing his sexual prowess, or by prowling singles bars for easy pick-ups and conquests. This way he contains and avoids his unwelcome homosexuality. Repression The removal from consciousness of forbidden thoughts and wishes. The removed content does not vanish and it remains as potent as ever, fermenting in one's unconscious. It is liable to create inner conflicts and anxiety and provoke other defense mechanisms to cope with these. Splitting This is a "primitive" defense mechanism. In other words, it begins to operate in very early infancy. It involves the inability to integrate contradictory qualities of the same object into a coherent picture. Mother has good qualities and bad, sometimes she is attentive and caring and sometimes distracted and cold. The baby is unable to grasp the complexities of her personality. Instead, the infant invents two constructs (entities), "Bad Mother" and "Good Mother". It relegates everything likable about mother to the "Good Mother" and contrasts it with "Bad Mother", the repository of everything it dislikes about her. This means that whenever mother acts nicely, the baby relates to the idealized "Good Mother" and whenever mother fails the test, the baby devalues her by interacting, in its mind, with "Bad Mother". These cycles of idealization followed by devaluation are common in some personality disorders, notably the Narcissistic and Borderline. Splitting can also apply to one's self. Patients with personality disorders often idealize themselves fantastically and grandiosely, only to harshly devalue, hate, and even harm themselves when they fail or are otherwise frustrated. Sublimation The conversion and channelling of unacceptable emotions into socially-condoned behavior. Freud described how sexual desires and urges are transformed into creative pursuits or politics. Undoing Trying to rid oneself of gnawing feelings of guilt by compensating the injured party either symbolically or actually.
Category: Psychology

whats your thoughts on this?

when we first met nothing of it. then she started staying at my house. then one day we messed around and she left. she was scared because we worked together. this went on for about a week. now during all of this time she was telling me about how she has slept with a married man while on tour, while she had a boyfriend. her boyfriend was about 30 years older than her. she was telling me how she could never be faithful and how she used people to help her to get to the next step career wise. she told me she got a tattoo and slept with the artist. he had a girlfriend, too. she told me how she was on a major record label, but had asked to leave the label because of issues with her and a married guy. ( i cant tell you who... you know of him for sure) then she told me she was using the tattoo guy for free tattoos. then all of a sudden i told her i was having feeling for her and she told me the same. but, all of a sudden i just couldnt stop telling her how messed up it was how she used all these people. i mean i really went off about it. it was just so messed up to me. then one day she stop talking to me for about a month. then she asked me to pick her up from the airport from her tour. i did. we started hanging out again and those feelings rushed back. we messed around a little, but she told me she never had feelings for me and was not attractive to me. then she ending up moving in with me. we slept in the same bed. we messed around. we never slept together or kissed at this time. then one day she told me she didnt have feelings for me again and liked this new guy. he gave her free haircuts. he liked her, too. he was married. i was pretty pist at her for the fact he was married and had kids. but to her it was o.k. i know i should of kept my mouth shut, but i didnt. we still messed around though. then one day i told her if she was going to leave and go see him that i could no longer be her friend. it was to messed up and i had feelings for her. she screamed at me and told me shed never be my girlfriend. then she left and came back a few hours later. she apologized and so did i. that night we drank and kissed for our first time. she said it was the best kiss she ever had. i was shocked by the power of it, too. then she started to have feelings for me. then about a week later she didnt. then the next day she did. back and forth. back and forth. then she left on tour. i flew to nyc to work with her and some other people. we go into a huge fight. everyone thought we were together and it pissed her off. then she left on her tour from nyc. we werent talking. when she came back on my birthday... she missed me. she took me to dinner, but before we got there we hugged and had a passionate kiss. it was a great night until we got to the apartment we were staying at. there she told me she didnt want to have sex because she just had sex with another guy whom she was in love with. but, she was confused because of how well our day went together. i was pissed, so we fought again. then we flew home to california. i decided to ignore everything she did with me. then she really started to fall for me, but she was also confused about two other guys. we became very close for about a month. we didnt drink. it was me and her. then the day before she left i went with her to a private show. we laid in bed in our hotel room and talked. then later after her show we went to our room. she went to the bath and came out, walked up to me, and had no clothes on. we really got in to it, but i stopped it. she said im thinking about telling everyone that were dating. i said thats great, but things will change when you leave on tour again with the other guy you like. she said i wish you didnt say that because im confused as if im in love with you. we messed around again, but didnt have sex. i have some great will power. plus, i wanted it to be right with her. this is were it gets weird. she told me that she would sleep with her bother if she had one. then she told me that if we had kids shed sleep with them, too. she was serious. she told me she was really messed up. i didnt know what to think. then the next morning she left. before that though she promised me that she wouldnt sleep with this guy. though she wasnt my girlfriend... very close though. about a week later she called me telling me how much she wanted me to be there with her and go on tour with her. i wanted to, but i didnt. one night i was drinking and she called. i asked her if she slept with that guy. she said maybe. she was scared. then she said she was confused about me this other guy and the one she slept with. i was bummed again. my fault though. then we fought for about two months. she was confused. and i was always asking about us. only when i was drinking though. i dont drink that much, but when i did i would say some messed up things like " let me guess youre sleeping with him again" its not that i wanted to say that its just she was so back and forth w
Answer: Despite the many trials during the course of the time condensed here I would call that living wild, and having fun! To the point, though, I don't want any of the following to offend you or her later on in any way, so please read it as advice and not as something meant to hurt any-ones feelings. Every one has there own way of reaching success, and happiness. In your 'flings' case, it may be sleeping around. For you it seems to be commitment and honesty. IMO not only does she sleep around for successes sake, but to feel loved, and real, and meaningful, as well. That thing she said about sleeping with relatives is a significant sign of her love - sex connection. To continue your current life style, and to continue feeding hers, keep living wild, and loving her. To live happily yourself (as far as i know) you need to move on, and find a woman who is looking for some of the same major things you are. You sound like a good guy, lacking a little confidence (and knowledge of the shift button:). If you ready to move on from a woman you handle dealing with because she shows you a little sideshow of your true importance, then do so. All along, as you do, you will question is she using me for me? You can even try to take things to a deeper level. If your ready, in your own words, tell her that you only want her, and that you only want her to want you.
Category: Psychology

What makes love and relationships last?

I am in an intimate relationship with a young woman: both of us are young, healthy and attracted to one another. However, the reasons we became attracted in the first place are arbitrary (in the right place at the right time, combined with superficial physical attraction at first), and now I wonder how/if this will affect the longevity of our relationship. I myself am perfectly satisfied with her but when she asks me what sets her apart from the rest of the women in the world (which really translates to "how do I know you are really attracted to me and arent going to ditch me as soon as youre bored") the answer inside of me is "you are the one I chose to spend all my time/energy building an intimate relationship with", by which I honestly mean I am committed to said relationship and entirely disinterested in finding another. I feel like the answer inside of me is satisfying, and I want her to feel the same way, but I get the feeling she wants to hear something about her physical being ("you are so much prettier/smarter/kinder/more fun than other women."). Having said that, she is not a superficial person, I just think she wants to have some sort of back-up from me to assure the woman in her... you know, she wants the romeo and juliet treatment. Anybody have insight on relationships and the importance of emotional intimacy over physical attraction? Anybody have insight on how I can understand my own feelings better, and intimate them to the young woman I am in this relationship with?
Answer: Relationships are dynamic; they change. They either change for the better or they change for the worse, but no relationship ever stays the same. You know this yourself because, as you say, in the beginning. . . but now . . . and that signifies a change. All relationships are based on four principles: Love, Honor, Trust and Obey. Sound familiar? You can't obey someone that you don't trust, you can't trust someone that you have no respect for (honor), and you cannot respect someone you don't love. And all of these things take time. Now when I say 'obey,' I don't mean that you rule over her, or she over you, with an iron fist. What I do mean is that, if you get married, only one of you can drive the car, so to speak. There are going to be decisions that must be made that you will have different stands on, and at that time one of you is going to have to defer to the other. If she is going to defer to you, she has to be able to trust you implicitly to make the right decision, and vice versa. If you're both always fighting for control of the steering wheel, you're going to run off into a ditch. Get it? All people want assurances that they're not wasting their time; that they're not Mr./Ms. Right Now and that they're not in real danger of being thrown over as soon as someone smarter/prettier/funnier comes along. This is human nature. The best thing to tell your girl is, YOU are the one I am with. I CHOOSE to be here with you. I don't have to make that choice, and yet I do. I have to trust you as much as you have to trust me. Just like you worry that I'll toss you aside for someone else, I have the same fear; that you'll toss me aside for someone else, but I choose to trust you, trust that you love me. If you do get married, not getting divorced is a very simple thing. Don't file for divorce. Both of you purpose and promise that no matter what, you are going to stick it out. Both of you need to realize that sometimes you're going to hate each other's guts. You both need to realize that sometimes you're going to love each other when the other does not. And you need to realize that these are the ebbs and flows of everyday, normal relationships. If you can get through the toughest of times, you can get through the rougher times as well. Emotional intimacy is another phrase for trust. And the biggest downfall for any marriage is when one of you becomes emotionally involved with someone else. You might not ever *do* anything with anyone else, but any person -- ANY person -- that you confide your deepest issues in other than your spouse is someone that you have committed emotional adultry with. For instance, my sister. She is continually on the phone with my mother talking about what a jerk her husband is. She tells her children, by happenstance, that their dad is the reason that none of their dreams are realized. No matter what my brother in law does, he is doomed. There are people who genuinely believe he's a jerk and there is nothing he can do right. My sister has discussed, and would happily, pick up her children and move halfway around the world to be with my mother because her husband has the audacity to not like the influence my mother has on my sister. I don't talk to my sister anymore because she can't see -- I mean she honestly can't see -- that she has sacrificed her marriage on the alter of mommy. ANY relationship that comes between you and your wife can kill your marriage. Always remember that, and talk about these things openly, that you would ditch your own family in a heartbeat if they ever became people that would try to come between you and your wife (whoever your wife might be), and make sure that she has the same thoughts, or you might find that your wife, much like my sister, would drop you in a heartbeat because Mommy said so. And most women want to get married and have children. As soon as you discover that you have no intention of marrying this girl, you need to let her go, because it's neither loving, nor kind, to hold on to someone until you have someone else. And most women want the Romeo and Juliette romance things from time to time. And it's not a matter of serenading her from the window, it's a matter of going out of your way to do something kind. I knew a guy years ago who wanted to do something nice for his wife's birthday. He didn't buy her diamonds and flowers and chocolates. He made tuna fish, and set the table, and made her a card. He reports that she was so moved by his efforts to show her that he loved her in the most simplest of ways, that he *got luckier,* better, more wonderfully than he ever had before. Love is an action word. It is something you do, not something you feel. Feelings are based on moments, and moments change. Do your love, don't feel your love. And this is true for anyone, especially your wife, regardless of who it may be. I hope I have helped you in some way.
Category: Other - Family & Relationships

any reasonable advice to not fight so much in a relationship?

Me and my boyfriend of 1 year and 3 months fight A lot. Probably about once a day. We love each other so much and we are a good couple we just butt-heads a lot! mostly because of his attitude and how i react to him in a bad mood. Any idea on how to make things better?
Answer: All relationships go through a variety of phases. There is the initial dating and courtship and infatuation period. If the relationship continues, it settles into a more stable time of building a history as a couple. We all know that it is possible to keep passion, romance, excitement and sexual intensity alive through the years, but we also know that many relationships settle into a kind of friendly (or not so friendly) roommate situation. Every relationship has it’s ups and downs, but there are tools that can keep passion perking right along. 1. Be kind - We tend to take our mates for granted. A smile, a wink, just a moment of kindness goes a long way. 2. Be attentive - Paying attention to the details of life is important. Pick up your own trash, and pick up for each other. Put things away, help each other with the small projects. These things are the currency of love. 3. Be gracious - Small surprises can create huge rewards in a relationship. these things add color, spice, and graciousness to our lives. 4. Be patient - We all have bad days. It happens, give him/her a break! This is the reality of life. Allow for it. 5. Be honest - Tell the truth about your feelings, and do it promptly and in a respectful, effective way. Share your disappointments and fears, but also share dreams, hopes, and gratitude's. Keeping secrets kills passion. 6. Be funny - Life seems to have supply its own stress and worry, but we have to provide the humor on our own. Share a joke, take time to tickle each other or rent a funny movie, and do it often. The couple that laughs together, often does other fun stuff together, too! 7. Be flexible - Over a lifetime, people change. Hopefully, your relationship will change and grow and mature with as you change. One of you will change careers, the other will change religions. One will have an illness, the other will make a mistake. Relationships either bend and flex with the winds of life, or they break. 8. Be generous - Surprise each other with flowers, candy, a card, or other gift. Do it often. Do it for no particular reason. Do it because you love each other and thought it would be nice to show it with a gift. 9. Be available - "Take time for each other". Schedule time to walk and talk, go for drives in the country, go to dinner and see a movie together being available to each other is one of the most critical components in keeping romance and passion alive. 10. Show affection regularly - Whether it's a kiss on the cheek, a touch on the arm in passing, or a hearty "thank you," happy couples are not shy about showing affection. 11. Keep arguments respectful - When you argue, stick to the issue at hand and avoid making personal attacks. Arguments that are kept fair can be constructive, but if you veer off into the land of mean comments and personal attacks, you'll likely never reach a compromise, much less a solution. 12. Communicate - Along with arguing respectfully, it's important to communicate respectfully. By sharing your thoughts, concerns and ideas regularly, you create an open environment of trust and intimacy. 13. Choose your battles - There are likely numerous little things that you COULD argue about in a day, but some issues are simply not solvable, nor are they worth getting upset over. Save the arguments for the big stuff, and simply learn to live with the rest of it. You'll both be happier in the long run. 14. Show your respect - Strong relationships are built on mutual respect. This means sticking up for your partner, supporting them, and never badmouthing them infront of others. 15. Be physical - This is about sensuality perhaps more than sexuality. Talk about the importance of scents, of candles and flowers and walks on the beach, talk about making love, about back rubs and holding hands, and creating memories. Someone has said, "Life is what happens while you were making other plans." Romance is about real life, not about dreams and fantasies of the perfect partner. Romance and passion are about taking time to enjoy the company of the person you love. Keep your relationship strong, romantic and built to last. Have fun. Do it today! Good Luck>r
Category: Singles & Dating

why do i feel trapped within my own body?

lately, days have just gone by in a haze. things are just passing me by and i constantly feel detached from everything around me, and buried deep within my own body. small little details are often forgotten (who i sent a message to, when this person called, what movie i watched and what happened), and its not some age-related memory loss because im only 14. no day that goes by ever feels normal, every day now seems kind of strange and foreign, and its starting to make me feel very depressed. its also very hard for me to read things and actually pick up whats going on, because i get trapped within my own thoughts and am unable to focus. but i dont know what to do, because i need to have two books read by the time school starts, and times running out. i see a therapist for GAD, and i am not on any medication. i tried explaining things to my therapist, but all she wants to focus on are me coping with social situations, which are not a very large problem and are not bothering me nearly as bad as this feeling of detachment is. i had an appointment with a psychiatrist as well, to see if i needed to be put on medication. this doctor didnt even show up for the appointment, and there was a crowd outside his office waiting for him to show up (which happened often, the people waiting said). he scheduled my first-time appointment at the same time as another womans, and all the other appointments were only 15 minutes apart. i now have to wait for over a month to see another psychiatrist, and i dont know if i can do this. this is stressing me out so badly that i cant even explain it.
Answer: The prob with the psych's is they don't usually have any experience themselves going thru these things. It sounded to me like you were starting to enter that mental state where after so many problems you just get fed up. Your brain kind of goes on hiatus. You're still there living life but what you need is a real chance with a person who's integrated in your daily life to just have a real convo. the idea of a psych is good but the atmosphere is too awkward and isn't conducive to actually helping in a lot of cases. Of course if you're naturally bipolar or something then you're kinda screwed since you were born with a brain that naturally is gonna make you feel sh*** and exacerbate any problems you have. 14 is a crappy age if I remember right haha. It really can be crappy (depending on how tough you are) till you're in college because in college you can get away from everyone and it's up to you at that point. Best advice i never got was do well enough in school to get a scholarship not because my family needs the money saved but because you want to get the hell away from everybody after a certain point. Also I started thinking about the nature of life itself and humanity and all that stereotypical nonsense. I really started to sit down and paint the most realistic picture of people and their mistakes and my mistakes and the things we do right as well as wrong. I realized that mostly anything that occurs is not a big deal, not even death. I choose to recognize the importance of death, fighting and people's feelings but I also realize both that it's not something that should cause me to flip out and I somehow found out how not to flip out when presented with a big problem. I think it all came from the (literally) years I spent thinking and writing and analyzing everything I and others around me did. Even people who f***ed me over I thought about why they did what they did, what I mighta done wrong, and if it was nothing then eventually I got my sh** together and said screw it. I did that all through high school, stayed near the 2 or 3 people who were important to me, had a few gf's moved along to college and didn't see a single thing come back to bother me. Also if you're truly brutally honest with yourself about yourself and you crack jokes all the time it gets hard to take any problems you may have with yourself seriously. Like me and my big man tits? Or tiny schmegegee. Do you know how many girls die laughing when you joke about that stuff? (of course delivery and timing is crucial. Always say it like it's just a fact and it's not important. Deliver a small penis joke with emotion and excitement and people just think you're a moron.) So comedy, self deprecating humor foremost, analyzing life itself, literally 2 or 3 people...maybe... and I didn't mention it but a few hobbies. Know what you love and love it within reason. Don't run around screaming Kamehameha but don't be afraid to say "Look i'm a complete dork for some reason i still like DBZ." (that was just an example). people usually respect and admirer honesty like that because it shows you're calm and easy about yourself, you actually do feel calm and easy and not having people goof on you is a huge boon. If you feel trapped inside yourself it's probably because you're hiding yourself and for good reason. people are a**holes! But just like death there isn't a darn thing you can do about it except move along and try to fix whatever it is about you that sucks. Because something always sucks about someone including me. It just doesn't have to be a big deal. Good luck dude...or dudette I don't remember if I'm writing this to male or female but it doesn't really matter. As I looked back and saw a fem avatar. but whatever i'm leaving that part up maybe it was funny. I have a few other similar answers up. if you look under my profile they should be easy to spot. Maybe I wrote it better in one of those or maybe you get the point perfectly with these words. Figured i might as well invite you to check it out though.
Category: Mental Health

Picking Your Business Battles | The Growth Coach Blog

Picking Your Business Battles Many business owners feel the need to do everything in their business; from the smallest, most insignificant daily task to the big picture roles of acting as a leader or marketer. Trying to balance so many roles at ... The purpose of having employees is to allow them to do the less important tasks while you tackle the big picture ones. ... The first step towards self-sufficiency is developing an understanding that you can't control every little thing.

do i have a right to be mad?

So my boyfriend got his car taken away until the end of this month but is still allowed to hang out with people,, he was telling me last night that his parents said that they could drop me off and pick me up and stuff like that so that we could still hang out, and he was like "but that would be rael akward" likre pretty much saying he doesnt want his parents to bring us places and he was like i miss my laura, and i was like well what are you doing today/tomorrow and hes like o i think im going to be hanging out with my friends and i was just like so are you saying that were not going to be able to hang out at all this weekend? and he didnt reply for like 10 min and i was just like pissed, so i put up an away message, and then he was like sorry i was doing something and i just didnt talk to him and he called me and i just didnt pick up and havent talked to him since what do you think?
Answer: if you having some issues like that, the most important thing is to talk about it and try to solve it... getting pissed and not picking the phone and etc. is the worst you can do. If you don't like something then you should make sure that the issue is solved. Because you can make him feel guilty and he will end up saying sorry and etc. but it wont change anything.. he might even be not completely sure why you were pissed. And it is not because he is dumb and senseless, it is because we underestimate the importance of simple communication and overestimate the ability of other person to understand what is going on inside our brain. He can't read your thoughts! you have to share them with you. Fighting because of such stupid small things, is really not worth it. Believe me there will be real problems one day, like in any relations, and if you don't find the way of solving such small things, you won't be able to handle something serious. Communication is everything! good luck!
Category: Singles & Dating

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